I’m officially in the 10th year of my professional career, so I’m not here to play games. I’m trying to tread carefully, but prove myself at the same time. For the first time in forever, I’m working with a group of people who only care about one thing: get the job done. As I finished off my first round of meet & greets, I can tell they all have personality — that’s the best and worst part of my job. As a project manager, my job is make sure things get done. With that said, people have to trust and like me. I’ve gotten used to this fact, so as I start this new job, i want to make sure they respect me; I want them to know that who I am, is a great person all-around. Not only am I someone you can grab coffee with, but someone you can depend on to meet the deadline.
I can’t lie; the most important part of a job is feeling like you’re being paid what you’re worth. The first two week of work are going to suck because I’m going to bust my ass & I don’t even know what my paycheck will look like. What I’ve learned to do, though, is to sit back and take a good look at myself and how much work I’m putting in at the beginning. At first, every job is good and everything is nice. Sometimes, we don’t realize how much of ourselves changes over time. I want to make sure I’m putting in as much work as I always want to put in. I don’t want to burn myself out, but I want to prove I’m worth my paycheck and more. I want to be who I’m meant to be & I’m going to be that today.
I’m rearranging my priorities. This isn’t my first time at the rodeo, as they say… so now I’m reading all my paperwork more carefully. I’ll definitely be contributing to the Roth 401K my company offers. My mother has been dropping hints about being humble and not changing my lifestyle and I don’t plan to. The only thing that will change is that I’ll be making more/higher payments towards my already existing debts.
The first debt I’m repaying is that to myself. When I feel unappreciated, I withdraw. I stopped working as hard as I could. I don’t want to be a 9-5er, but I want to get to work and get my shit done. That means saying no to late nights doing whatever happens to be a distraction or might make me late to work. Lately, I’ve gotten asked to attend more shows, interviews, podcasts and even make custom clothing, but my priority is that which is definitely going to pay my bills. I’ve learned to love my hobbies and have fun when I can, but I’ve got to keep my head on right. I sometimes feel like I’m not doing enough with my music or in my relationship… but there are tough decisions to make if you want to be where you have to be. I need to save for my mother’s retirement, nah mean?
So, as I start my second week, I want to go into this with as much passion as the first. I want to make my mark. I feel like there is so much opportunity here & I don’t want it to slip by me. I feel like there is a door wide open & I just hope it doesn’t close shut on me… I’m trying to hold it open but I might have to just run through it.
Tryina stay hungry & stay humble.
afterward.
I want to write more about my journey here. I need to write more about my journey… it’s just that I’ve been going through so much that I haven’t been able to think straight. As much as I love writing… and as much as I love music… when my bills are piling up, there’s nothing else I can think about except how I’m making it and I don’t have much time for the things I love. The hope i that ‘I can find a better balance to do both. Or maybe I’m finally in the place where I can afford that balance. Honestly, life is money. I love my art… but it doesn’t pay like a corporate job does and as long as that’s the case, my job will be my priority. I understand how bless I am and I love my job.. it pains me to think I have to choose. Why would I give up this paycheck? Get your mind right. lol. Anyway… back to work. I’ll check in with you next week 😉
Just my thoughts… Just what I was feeling at the time.
EllaThought 